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Playing with ideas. Options
Renee`
#1 Posted : Tuesday, September 22, 2009 8:33:15 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 7/4/2009
Posts: 29
I am not comfortable with having a freebirth. I like to know that there are people around me who can completely support every aspect of my birth. Which is why I want a homebirth.

However it really is proving very hard to actually find a midwife for ME!!

After my latest antenatal appointment, I am really really not feeling comfortable, and am in overdrive trying to find a suitable middie.

Anyway, someone proposed using a doula, I want to know what is the difference if I have a doula and no midwife?
Mumma to Beautiful Kaele - Nov 2007 - baker to a gorgeous March bubba, who will be arriving in my arms at home
lisa
#2 Posted : Wednesday, September 23, 2009 4:18:16 AM
Rank: Advanced Member


Joined: 6/28/2009
Posts: 77
Hi Renee,
This is one very contentious area around doulas and birth. There are 2 camps, 1 camp of doulas will support women at home with out a midwife and the other camp wont.
Finding a doula that support freebirth shouldnt be too hard, as long as they are in your area.
The camp that wont support a freebirth are doulas that do not want to be mistaken for a lay midwife.
Birthing at home alone is not illegal at all, but in some states, if not all, it is illegal to be a lay midwife.
If something went wrong, the doula could be held accountable.
If you go the doula route, make sure you are both very clear about boundries and roles, and get a contract.

Kiera
#3 Posted : Wednesday, September 23, 2009 5:00:35 AM
Rank: Advanced Member



Joined: 6/15/2009
Posts: 250
Renee,
Birthing with just a doula is more or less freebirth. As they aren't medically trained.

If you choose that route I second what Lisa said, just make sure you get everything down on paper. It seems so awful to have to do that, but in the case that god forbid the worst did happen, you all need to know where you stand.

Are you having issues finding a midwife that suits you? Or finding a midwife full stop?

I'm sure somewhere in some of our networks, we'll be able to point you in the right direction.

(((hugs)))

Mummy to Connor (07/07) birthed in hospital - my "Inspiration" baby, and Oliver (02/09) Birthed Peacefully at home in water - my "Best poo ever"
Renee`
#4 Posted : Wednesday, September 23, 2009 4:05:56 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 7/4/2009
Posts: 29
Thanks for that girls. I would have to be very specific. I thought Doulas did have some medical training, like CPR etc. Well that just discounts the idea for me.

I am on the verge of tears right now. Just received an email from one of the possible middies, who Ive been waiting to hear from (Was in contact with her earlier on in pregnancy) and she let me know that they cannot look after women with a higher BMI - same as the hospital policy. So that is me.

I just don't understand why it has to be this way - I was telling my mum and she said "Wel lthey have to have guidelines" , I understand that, but being fat does not mean you cannot push a baby out.
I may be "Too fat" according to a freakin chart, but I am healthy, and happy.

I don't want to freebirth, I want to have a midwife with me. I don't want to be under a doctor care at hospital. My last birth, why can't I just have it the way I want.

Ok not on the verge of tears anymore, I am in tears :(
Mumma to Beautiful Kaele - Nov 2007 - baker to a gorgeous March bubba, who will be arriving in my arms at home
lisa
#5 Posted : Wednesday, September 23, 2009 4:56:27 PM
Rank: Advanced Member


Joined: 6/28/2009
Posts: 77
Ahhh Renee, where do you live? There may actually be lay midwives in your area, you know unregistered, very skilled and educated women. Some doulas were midwives, please dont give up. (-:
The BMI thing is bullshit...and ridiculously low! Give me somemore detaisl and we can explore your options more
Kiera
#6 Posted : Wednesday, September 23, 2009 7:18:11 PM
Rank: Advanced Member



Joined: 6/15/2009
Posts: 250
Ah Renee, don't give up hope, where there's a will there's a way. Contact Lisa, she has an amazing network....


((((Massive hugs))))

Mummy to Connor (07/07) birthed in hospital - my "Inspiration" baby, and Oliver (02/09) Birthed Peacefully at home in water - my "Best poo ever"
leah
#7 Posted : Thursday, September 24, 2009 3:45:08 PM
Rank: Advanced Member


Joined: 6/28/2009
Posts: 61
Renee PM me your location and I'll ask around for you... lots of networks out there to help you :)

The BMI thing is bullshit! You'll find the right middie honey :hugs:
Leah - Mumma to T (c-sec) and S (my HBAC!), wife to R. non-vaxxing, cloth nappying, co-sleeping, breastfeeding, baby-wearing, student naturopath.
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